When’s the last time you celebrated something awesome that a friend did? When’s the last time you celebrated something awesome YOU did?
Take inspiration from my brilliant friend Kirsty who created a #dailyawesomeness channel in Slack where we post our wins and celebrate one another. It has me noodling on instead of cutting down the tall poppy, what if we helped it grow?
Have you ever had the experience of hearing someone share an embarrassing, vulnerable story, and immediately feeling more connected to them? Like the time I wore shorts to a job interview with an Executive in a very formal government department.
“The tone is wrong, the characters ring false and the humour is strained and simply awful. Don’t waste your time and money.“
“I loved every minute reading it. It had a whole new feel to it.”
These are two seperate reviews of the exact same book. Two humans having a completely different experience when faced with the same thing.
It’s baffling, hilarious and really quite reassuring.
Another moment of Sonder. Another reminder that no-one knows exactly what you know, believes exactly what you believe or cares for exactly what you care for. Another reason to lead with curiosity and empathy and ask: what might be happening for this person to make them feel this way?
The book in question? One from the Harry Potter series.
There’s a story in the book Atomic Habits about a weightlifting coach who works with some of the world’s top athletes. When asked what separates the best from the others (ie people like me with obnoxiously long limbs and poor flexibility) he shares that beyond genetics and muscle mass he believes it boils down to ones ability to deal with the boredom of doing the same exercises over and over, session after session, year after year.
Three things I take from this:
Those who are world class at what they do aren’t always motivated and inspired. They get bored and feel like giving up just like the rest of us and;
While they might feel like skipping a session, those at the top of their game choose to show up anyway. They realise that the act of showing up is a skill.
At 6″7′ with 2 dinky hips and poor hamstring flexibility, I’ll never be a world class weightlifter.
That’s it for this month. If you’re feeling generous forward this email to a friend along with your completed Wordle, Quordle and Octordle just to remind them of your genius and tell them to join the list of legends that receives these posts in their inbox.
In listening to (and attempting to make sense of) some of the genius from David Whyte I was struck that us even being here on this particular day reading this particular blog post on a device that 50 years ago would’ve been considered science fiction is completely absurd and totally remarkable.
I was recently pushed an ad that started with this question:
Do you like GANTT charts?
I couldn’t believe it. GANTT CHARTS?! Does ANYONE like GANTT charts?! What the hell is this company talking about?!
Then I thought of the project managers and detail oriented planners of the world. Those who love talking about dependencies, timelines and milestones. The brilliant, operational geniuses like my partner, who keep the rest of us honest and on track. Where would we be without them?
This fiasco reminded me that if something is not appealing to us, that doesn’t make it wrong, stupid or ineffective. It just means it’s not for us (and that is okay).
For those of you who don’t know what a GANTT chart is consider an even more basic example: Horse riding boots are for those who ride horses, not for those who don’t. The opinion of non-horse-riding humans, no matter how loud they are, is largely irrelevant.
What if you had to make up a song on the spot with a friend about your favourite Ninja Turtle?
How would you approach it knowing there’s no time to prepare? What might you say? How would you keep people engaged without preparing a slide deck or speaker notes? What would you do when you make a mistake?
See below for a mind boggling example of said prompt (be warned: it contains expletives).
The lessons I see are many and varied. Most notably the spirit of the collaboration. It’s joyful, full of delight and has no attachment to perfect.
And while us mere mortals don’t have to do an improvised rap in front of millions of YouTubers, it does make me wonder: what if we showed up with with no scripts and no slides to our next meeting? What if we started with a prompt and proceeded to give everyone in the room equal space, time and permission to respond? What if we sought to build on each idea with as much joy as these two do, even the ones that don’t make sense?
What are you not doing that you know you ought to be?
Because we often have an idea of how we could be better spending our energy and time and just need a nudge to actually do it. Today I got that nudge from my friend, the brilliant Josh Janssen, and am passing it on to you. It’s a nudge on a nudge. A nudge-ception if you will.
May is upon us which means it’s time for a collection of books and podcasts that I consumed in April and want to recommend to you for some noodling over the next month.
If you’re seeking some great fiction:
Migrations by Charlotte McConaughey has got you covered and will make your eyes water. If this happens in a public place as it did to me, consider making a terrible joke like “is someone cutting onions in here?” Smooth.
If you’re curious about improving relationships of any kind:
Fierce Intimacy by Terry Real has got you covered. It’s got some blemishes for sure but among them are some amazing insights and questions for being more self-aware in how you show up in your relationships.
If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to own/run a successful restaurant(s):
Eat a Peach by David Chang will show you, warts and all, through some amazing storytelling that leaves you thinking “this can’t be real”.
If you’re as fascinated about the future of work as I am:
Because sometimes we show up in ways we’re not proud of and naming what this looks like can help us better recognise when it happens.
Said another way: when the barista takes an extra 23 seconds to make my coffee and I am convinced they’re out to destroy me, it’s more likely I’m showing up impatiently, selfishly, and self-righteously as opposed to them being an evil villain out to ruin my day.
More recently I’ve been thinking that the opposite is also true: that with information we also create stories.
Given how smart all of you are, this could be the most obvious post I’ve ever written, but it has me noodling on questions like where are you getting your information from? and where are you not getting your information from?
Because contrary to what most slide deck heavy meetings/projects would suggest: there’s no rule saying they can’t be. And as if we needed another reason: Microsoft have found there’s been an increase of 250% in weekly time spent in meetings since February 2020.